But what is victim trauma? By definition: Profound physical, emotional, and psychological response to a distressing event or crime. It overwhelms a person’s ability to cope, and affects their safety, mental well-being, and daily functioning. Victim trauma can be found in all cases of emergencies and disasters, and our first responders are trained in how to help and treat those who are affected and suffering. House fires, wildfires, floods, vehicle accidents, the impact or aftermath of crime and violence...the immediate to first 24-48 hours are the most critical.
After the breaking news and social media posts diminish, and life and 'business-as-usual' resumes and we go about our daily lives...we can often get complacent and have the attitude of "Well, that will never happen to me or my family or friends." My own life experiences, along with education and trainings in both EMS and with the Red Cross continually show me that when you wake up in the morning, you never know how a day will go or end. Disaster and crime can happen to anyone at any time, in any place.
One missing person might not seem like the definition of a disaster to some folks...but it most certainly is to the families and loved ones affected and traumatized, the ripple effects continuing on for the rest of their lives. Sometimes those who survive it didn't choose it. You cannot dismiss the shock, suffering, loss, and the grief of the trauma experience.Surviving to Healing...
Life is never the same after a disaster or traumatic experience. It's hard to know what to say to someone after a tragedy strikes, as shock and grief affects everyone differently. And often the survivors don't really want to have conversations about the 'stages of grief', or hear the passive "I'm so sorry, let me know if you need anything"...or have to witness news articles or the faces of their loved ones (or even theirs!) plastered all over social media. That can sometimes make it even worse, because the wounds which are desperately trying to heal are being repeatedly opened.
The challenge? Those immediate to first 24-48 hours! For victim survivors of domestic violence, assault, abuse, suicide/suicidal ideations...it can be very difficult to know how to get on a path of healing, instead of slipping backwards and gravitating towards cycles of insanity and darkness. To get to a point of courage and understanding that life is precious and worth living. To get out of the toxic environments, to even get out of bed in the morning! To get to a point to where fear and doubt is replaced with hope and confidence. It can take a lot of time before one's journey can begin again, and the good pathways aren't always clear...the roads are always wrought with hills and valleys, cliffs and potholes, bad actors and predators on the hunt.
I have yet to see anyone bouncing out of a hospital ER shouting, "I'm great, I'm healed, it's a miracle!" Healing takes a lot of time, and depending on the severity, a very long time.
Healing to Thriving...
Eventually, all wounds do heal, and we're left with scars to remind us of what we've survived, what we've (hopefully) learned, and how we can become stronger with each passing day.
It also takes time, attention, and grace on the part of those who actively and genuinely care. It takes presence, listening, encouragement, consistency. I just can't say enough about the people, advocates, groups, and organizations whose mission it is to do just that: actively and genuinely care. Read their mission statements; browse through their sites and social media. Reach out; ask how they can help, or what you can do to help. Donate and support those missions and resources. Include them in your own network of care; refer those who might be in need of their programs.
MMIP Wind River cares! There is a Report-Tiplines page that can guide those who have loved ones who are missing to properly submit a report or tip to agencies and relevant organizations. There is a Resources page with a listing of groups and organizations that can help survivors in getting the support they need. To get even just one person on the right path again can be a benefit a whole tribe/community in a good way, and these resources and programs exist to help. We're stronger together, as a team!
Lastly...
June is Elder Abuse Awareness Month. When we are young, we are taught to respect our elders. As their spirits draw nearer to our ancestors, how we treat our elders speaks volumes about ourselves as a people. Neglect and mistreatment has no place when it comes to those who are wiser and have lived to see so many more years/decades than us. So I would like to close with the following:
“Consider the advice of your elders.”
but for the lives they have lived in close conversation with the earth,
the seasons, loss, resilience, and time itself.
Their words are not meant to command —
they are meant to guide.
Not because elders are always right,
but because they have been wrong,
and survived the lessons that followed.
Every line on their face carries a story.
Every pause in their speech holds memory.
They have watched generations rise and fall,
learned when to speak, when to listen,
and when to let the wind carry the answer.
To listen to an elder is to borrow wisdom without paying the full price of pain.
It is to walk a path already mapped by experience,
rooted in respect for the land, the people, and the spirit.
In honoring our elders,
we honor the past —
and protect the future."
Project & Outreach Coordinator
MMIPWindRiver.org
E-mail: MMIPWindRiver@gmail.com
