I spoke briefly during the last Riverton City Council, after the Suicide Prevention Month proclamation was read. As I stood before them, I told them I wished I could tell them the number of suicides/suicidal ideation calls that our EMTs respond to on a monthly, weekly, or daily basis. I couldn't tell them because of confidentiality and protocols, but: "...what I can tell you is that they are numbers you would not like to hear." And that there are names...lives...connected and associated with those numbers.
I've sat in on the Suicide Prevention Task Force for a while now, and now as their newest board member, my approach and focus on all things prevention is being mindful of two things that everyone needs: Hope and healing. In a cruel, unforgiving world, these two things can be very difficult to find...switching the conversations from a stigmatized issue which is uncomfortable to talk about, to caring about the response and delivery of these two things for those who desperately need them. Most of all, having the resources and people who can show the way from despair to hope, from hope to healing...towards a meaningful, healthy Life.
But how bad does it have to get?
What are some of the things that cause one to contemplate suicide? Victims of domestic violence may get to a point to where they just can't take it anymore...for me, I believed that death would've been better than living in my abusive situation. How bad does it have to get, how far does it have to go until one is faced with that choice?
There are victims of bullying who can feel that same way. The teasing, the goading, the ridicule, the gaslighting, the gossip...how bad does it have to get before a kid, a teenager, an adult...thinks they're stupid or ugly, or beat down to feelings of despair and worthlessness?
There are victims of substances that can skew a person's mental state to where their baseline normal is so messed up, the only thing that makes them "feel good" is alcohol (a depressant) or drugs. Their addictions constantly lie to them...then they deal with feelings of regret and self-loathing. How bad does it have to get before those temporary "fixes" destroy the body, and the mind becomes a hopeless, dark prison?
There are victims of trafficking who are groomed and stuck in a state of Stockholm Syndrome, where use and abuse, sex, crime, violence is the only the life they know and becomes their norm. How bad does it have to get before trafficking becomes tolerated or acceptable to people and communities that might know or unknowingly host and hide those sick individuals who buy women, children, and teens, online or on the black market?
There are victims of the economy, who try to make it in a thankless, unsustainable job...barely or unable to pay rent, utilities, or even food. Maybe they're jobless, homeless, or have to live in their car, or can't even afford the gas to put into it. Maybe they have kids, and can't afford child care. Maybe on the outside they try to maintain their dignity, but on the inside they might feel worthless, exhausted by the constant one step forward, five steps back. How bad does it have to get before they're backed against a wall, and they stop stepping altogether?
There are victims who are a combination of all of the above. They become the Missing Among Us...they're not invisible; they're right under our very noses.
How bad does it have to get before society lifts up the rugs to uncover the realities and truths about those who are helpless and hurting in prisons unseen? We can sweep it all under the rug, thinking: "Not my problem. They're the ones that made bad choices, they're the ones that got themselves into their own mess, they're the ones who chose to be where they are. They must like it there, or they wouldn't be there...why should I do anything for them?"
And, there it is. That's how bad it gets...when people stop caring, they become a part of the problem. They become the bullies of the bullied, perpetrators of the abused, the dealers, the sellers and buyers, the dark guards of the mind prisons. They become the feared of the fearful, not the hope for the hopeful.
So what does it take? It takes time and people. Time for the people who do care, enough to guide and encourage, bring hope and healing to those who are hurting. There are reasons why some people make it a career path in the fields of criminal justice, counseling, mentorship, and advocacy. There are reasons why people invest their time to volunteer with groups and organizations who are not afraid to have those difficult conversations, do the hard things, lift the rugs, and shed some streams of light into those dark, hopeless tunnels. And it's not just their job to care; it's their mission and passion to care!
We have two months ahead of us, back-to-back: September for Suicide Prevention Month, and October for Domestic Violence Awareness Month. There are good people involved in so many groups and organizations who take the time to care about these two critical issues that exist everywhere. I make it a point to share their posts on MMIP Wind River's Facebook as much as possible, and I hope that everyone can show support for them by either donating or volunteering towards what we're all passionate about.
Because together we all care enough to make it our mission to lift the rugs, shed light in the tunnels, and be the guides towards Hope and Healing. And then...
They're alone...until they're not, anymore.
They cry...until they don't, anymore.
They heal...until they're strong again.
They live.
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